Interesting Topics To Talk About With A Girl

Being a good conversationalist is a skill that is acquired through practice. Though some people may seem like naturals when it comes to conversation, most people learn through repeated practice. With a little awareness, knowledge, and practice, you too can become better at having good conversations, which is an important skill for everyone to develop.

Growing up I was always somewhat of a socially awkward guy. Though, I could to my friends just fine, talking with strangers was always a challenge. Small talk always felt awkward and forced, and basic conversations ran dry really fast. It wasn’t until I got a job as a cashier that my conversation skills really started to improve. It’s amazing how fast my conversation skills developed after talking with hundreds of strangers a day. If somebody as socially awkward as me can improve my abilities at conversation, you absolutely can too. 

In this post I’m going to cover a few things to help you have interesting conversations with women. We’re going to go over:

1. Why You Should Care About Being Good At Conversation
2. What Makes a Good Conversationalist
3. Topics To Talk About With A Girl
4. How To Keep A Conversation Going

Why You Should Care About Being Good at Conversation

Being good at conversation can help you in both your personal life and your professional life. For example, when you improve your conversation abilities you can:

• Make friends more easily
• Improve your professional life
• Enjoy yourself more often
• Get dates more easily

Make Friends More Easily

Being good at conversation makes it easier to connect with people and make friends. And who doesn’t love having more friends. When you become better at talking,  you will be more confident interacting with strangers in public. This can greatly improve your social network (which in turn make it easier to meet people)

Improve Your Professional Life

You will deal with human interaction in the workplace, there is simply no avoiding it. Improving your conversation abilities can make you more likeable at work, improve your relationships with superiors and subordinates, and expand your professional network. If you are in a customer facing sales role, good conversation is a must have.

Enjoy Yourself More Often

When you find yourself having good conversations more easily with others, you may start to find that you actually enjoy it. Humans are social creatures, it’s fun to connect, make small talk, and share stories with others. Good conversations can improve your quality of life. 

Get Dates More Easily

Okay, this is the real reason you are all here, right? Women find it attractive when a man has good conversation abilities. When you are confident in your conversation abilities, you will find yourself approaching women more easily, and this can lead you into getting dates more easily. Women love talking, and if you can prove to be a good conversationalist and a good listener, you’ll make a really good impression.

What Makes A Good Conversationalist? 

Everyone has had bad conversations with people before . There’s bad conversations where the other person never seem to shut up, and it feels more like they are talking at us, then talking to us. Or there’s bad conversations where the other person feels the need to one up everything you say. Those types of conversations can be frustrating and unpleasant. If your end goal is to gain friends more easily, get dates, or make your crush like you, then you need to learn the art of how to have a good conversation. Let’s take a look at nine rules you can follow to have better conversations.

9 Rules to Follow to Be a Better Conversationalist

1. Listen More Than Talk
2. Don’t Always Interrupt with Personal Experiences
3. Be Well Informed
4. Admit When You Don’t Know
5. Be Genuinely Interested
6. Be Non-judgemental and Respectful
7. Ask Purposeful Questions
8. Be Focused
9. Don’t interrupt

 

1. Listen More Than Talk

If you want to drastically improve your conversational abilities, the first important rule is to become a better listener. People love to talk, and when you show them that you value what they have to say, by actually listening, they feel respected and are more friendly towards you. By listening carefully during a conversation, you can ask appropriate questions, which leads to a more natural flow of the conversation. 

Don’t be one of those people that is just waiting for their turn to talk in a conversation. This is very off putting. Improving your listening skills is a great first step in mastering conversation. 

2. Don’t Interrupt with Personal Experiences

When having a conversation, try to avoid constantly interrupting the conversation with your own personal experiences with the topic at hand. This is a natural tendency that many people fall into, but it makes the other person feel like you are making the conversation about you instead of really listening to what they have to say.

 It might be tempting to blurt out there first thing that comes to mind about the subject (which is usually gonna be your own personal experience), but instead, try to ask meaningful questions and get the other person to open up more about the subject. 

3. Be Well Informed

Being well informed an up to date on conversation topics like music, movies, culture, news, and sports can drastically improve your conversation abilities. If you are well informed on these topics of conversation, you can ask more meaningful questions and have better conversations. 

This is one of the reasons that having conversations about topics you are interested in is so enjoyable. Typically when you are interested in a subject, you are way more informed on the issue, and can have deeper conversations about the topic. One of the keys in having conversations with people, is trying to find out your shared interests so you can connect over them.

4. Admit When You Don’t Know

It’s very easy to spot someone who comes off as fake or phony. There’s nothing wrong with not   knowing everything about a particular subject. When you’re unsure about something, or you are not following what another person is saying, simply admit it, and be honest about it. When you are honest and open, people see you as more sincere and true, which are great qualities to have.

5. Be Genuinely Interested

Being genuinely interested in a person and what they have to say is one of the most powerful  things you can do to improve your conversation abilities. When you are truly fascinated with somebody, their experiences, and their viewpoints, conversations flow more naturally, which leads to better conversations. It also makes the other person feel more valued and respected, and can even give them a little self-esteem boost, which can help introverted people open up more. 

6. Be Non-judgmental and Respectful

Everyone has different points of view and different opinions on subjects. It’s important to remember that it’s okay to disagree with somebody. You must avoid becoming judgmental or overly critical when you are conversing with someone, even if you may disagree with them on the issue. Conversations with overly judgemental people can cause others to shut down, or turn the conversation into a confrontation. If your goal is to “win” the conversation, you will lose every time. Don’t be that person. 

7. Ask Purposeful Questions

Asking meaningful questions can really drive a conversation. Learning this skill will be valuable and having deeper conversations with people. Building off of earlier points, to ask meaningful questions, you have to really listen to what they are saying, and be interested in it. If you are listening, and interested, you will have a ton of curiosity about the topic and the other person’s viewpoint, and this will naturally drive the conversation. 

8. Be Focused

Being present and mindful during a conversation is one of the most important rules to follow. When you are truly present during a conversation it causes the other person to see you in a more positive light, and the conversation can flow more naturally. 

We’ve all had conversations where we start a sentence and you can see the other person’s eyes glaze over and they are no longer listening. When that happens to you, it can make you feel disrespected and devalued. So remember, stay focused, avoid daydreaming, and be present when having a conversation, especially when you want the person to like you!

9. Don’t Interrupt 

This point cannot be stated enough. Don’t interrupt when the other person is talking. There is a very natural and delicate flow to a good conversation. If you are constantly interrupting the flow to blurt out the first thing that comes to mind, you will find you conversations running dry, and staying very superficial. Avoid this, and you will find your conversational abilities improving in no time. 

Topics to Talk About With a Girl

Okay this is why you are all here, right? You want to have more interesting, deeper, and meaningful conversations with girls. A good conversation starts with a good topic. Now that you’ve learned some of the rules to follow for having better conversations, let’s look at some interesting topics to talk about with girls.

Best Topics to Talk about with Girls 

1. Hobbies
2. Goals and Aspirations
3. Past Experiences
4. Family
5. Pop-Culture
6. Social/Political Issues/Current Events

 

1. Hobbies

People love talking about things they are interested in. It’s no secret. Ask somebody a question about something they are passionate about and their eyes light up instantly. Seriously, think about something you’re actually interested in, and how easy it would be to have an endless conversation about it. To have a good conversation with a girl that will allow you to be seen in the best light, find these passion topics and ask about them.

The easiest way to do this is to find out their hobbies. How do they spend their leisure time? What do they enjoy doing the most? Learning about what another person is enthusiastic about is surefire way to have a great conversation, and gain some meaningful insights about the person you are conversing with. So next time you’re talking to a new girl, that you may be interested in, ask them about their interests and hobbies.

2. Goals and Aspirations

Asking a girl about their goals and aspirations is another way to gain meaningful insights into that person, and it makes for a great conversation subject. When you ask about their hopes, dreams, and the things they are working towards in life, it can really give you deep insights into the driving forces behind the person. Not to mention the follow up conversations are nearly endless. You can ask why the want that goal, if any past experiences contributed to their aspirations, or how they plan to achieve their aspirations.

Asking these kinds of questions also shows that you are truly interested in the person, and it will make them feel more valued. People like to talk about themselves, and meaningful conversations about what a person hopes to achieve in life can really help you form a connection with someone.

3. Past Experiences

One of the most enjoyable things about connecting with a new girl is learning about all the past experiences of the person. If you’re looking for great conversation ideas to get to know a girl better, try the following questions: 

• What kind of past jobs have you had?
• What are your most cherished memories?
• What are your favorite places you have visited?
• What was your favorite vacation you have ever been on, and why?
• What cities/states/countries have you lived in?
• Where did you grow up?

The possibilities are endless, and the interesting spin off conversations you can have when talking about somebody’s past experiences are always enjoyable and fun to learn about. So, next time you want to have a good conversation, try asking about past experiences they have had. 

4. Family

Learning about a person’s family and the environment they grew up in a fascinating way to learn about someone new. You can really learn a lot about a person when you ask them about parents, brothers, sisters, pets, and their home environment. You can ask them how they get along with their family, how often they see them, what their parents do for work. There is room for endless conversation here, and it really helps you get a sense for the experiences of the person in front of you. People love to share, and this is an easy way to get the ball rolling during a conversation. 

5. Pop-Culture

It’s always enjoyable to learn about a person’s interests and tastes. Which is why asking about pop-culture related topics is such a great conversation to have with a girl. You can learn about their favorite bands, genres of music, movies. T.V. shows, and other interests. It’s fun to hear from other people’s viewpoints about the unique things they enjoy, that may be different than your own.

It’s also a good way to connect with someone when you have similar interests. May you love the same bands, or T.V. shows, and can spend hours discussing your shared love of these topics. Even if you end up having completely different tastes it still makes for a good conversation, and a great way to learn about a person. 

6. Viewpoints On Social/Political Issues/Current Events

Social and political viewpoints are always a fun and engaging conversation idea to engage in with someone new. There are endless hot topics and current events that you can ask about which can lead to some great conversations. Just remember to practice some of the rules we covered earlier for having good conversations, such as being non-judgemental. It’s okay if the person has different viewpoints on things than you. You can still get along with someone and have a fun conversation while disagreeing. So, don’t forget to stay respectful. 

How to Keep a Conversation Going

The next step in improving your conversational abilities and having a good conversation is to improve your ability to keep a conversation going. If you’re having a great conversation that you are both finding enjoyable, you don’t want the conversation to run dry and be stuck in an awkward silence. Follow the tips below to keep a conversation going.

Tips On Keeping A Conversation Going with a Girl:

1. Explore Topics Deeper
2. Read Cues on When They are Not Interested
3. Listen for Conversational Leads
4. Stay Open and Don’t Filter
5. Don’t Panic During Silence

 

1. Explore Topics Deeper

One of the best skills you can develop that will lead to your ability to keep conversations flowing naturally, is the ability to ask good questions that leads to exploring topics more deeply. For example if you two are chatting about what each of you does for work, ask questions to explore the topic of work more deeply. You can ask:

• What do you like most about your job?
• What do you dislike about your job?
• Is this the kind of work you see yourself doing for the rest of your career?
• What is your dream job?

When you learn to ask good questions and explore topics of conversation deeply, you will have a very easy time keeping conversations going. You can apply the above example to a wide variety of topics, and have some really great conversations while getting to know someone. 

2. Read Cues on When They Are Not Interested

This advice comes in two parts, firstly you need to be able to read cues on when she is not interested in you. This usually only applies if your are approaching a girl in public that you aren’t on friendly terms with yet. 

If you are approaching a woman in a bar or other setting, and she does 2 or more of the following, she likely isn’t interested, and you shouldn’t try to force a conversation when it’s not gonna happen:

• Doesn’t make eye contact
• One word replies, or barely trying to keep a conversation going
• Constantly checking her phone
• She sounds bored

If you find yourself trying to talk to someone who does a few of the above, you should just accept that she is not interested and move on. It happens to the best of us, and you can’t force a good conversation with unwilling participants. 

The second part of this advice applies to you if you’re having a conversation with a girl you are already friendly with or are out on a date with. Though she may be interested in you, you have to learn to read cues she is not in the topic of conversation. 

For example, in our section above, where we covered the most interesting conversation subjects to talk about with a girl, we talked about how political issues is a good topic of conversation. However, you have to understand, not everyone enjoys discussing politics. So for one girl, this may be an extremely engaging and enjoyable topic to talk about, for other girls politics are incredibly boring, and it’s not at all what they would enjoy discussing. 

You have to learn to read cues that the subject is boring to them, so you can move on to a more interesting topic. The best way to tell if you need to switch the topic of conversation, is to listen for how they are responding to the conversation. If they are offering one word replies, or barely responding and sound bored about the topic, it’s time to move on to a more interesting subject. Some topics are just boring, and you can’t force a good conversation with a girl if they find it boring to talk about.

3. Listen for Conversational Leads

Another great tip that will help you keep your conversations flowing more easily is to listen for conversational leads. Sometimes people have things they already want to talk about, and you just have to pick up on these cues to get things flowing. For example if she says that her day was really stressful. She might want to talk about her day. You can ask her what made it stressful and let her vent. Most guys aren’t good at picking up these conversational leads, but they are there all the time. Learn to listen for these conversational leads and explore the topic deeper building on the strategies we have already discussed.

4. Stay Open and Don’t Filter

If you’re with a new girl and you really want to impress her, you might find yourself over-analyzing everything you say and filtering your words to try to paint yourself in a certain light. This is detrimental to having a good conversation. If you find yourself holding back or choosing your words carefully when having a conversation with a girl try to be straightforward and honest with your thoughts on the conversation at hand. When you can be open and true to yourself, you will find you have much better conversations, and you come off as more authentic.

5. Be Comfortable with Silence

Even in great conversations silence happens. It’s okay if there are pauses and breaks in the conversation. So if one topic comes to a gradual end and there is a small silence, accept that silence is a natural part of a healthy conversation. 

Silence is only awkward if you make it awkward. With my really close friends and family, there is plenty of silence. But it’s not awkward at all. Why is this? It’s because we are completely comfortable with each other and don’t feel the need to constantly talk.  If you learn to be comfortable during silence and breaks in the conversation, you can make the girl you are talking to feel like you are old friends, and everyone will be more comfortable and relaxed. 

In summary, we’ve covered some of the benefits of being good at conversation, some essential rules to follow to make you better at conversations, some great topics to talk about with girls that will allow you to have deep and meaningful conversations, and a few tips on how to keep a conversation going. 

The strategies we have covered apply to conversations through a wide variety of mediums. They can be employed in person, over text, or through apps like tinder, and whatsapp. They can be used with your crush, girlfriend, or even to improve your conversations with friends in general.

The key thing to remember is that every girl is different. They all have different interests and passions, and enjoy conversing about different things. One of the most enjoyable things about chatting with someone new is discovering what your shared interests are and connecting over them.